The "SCOOP" on Gossip

Have you ever played the game Telephone? You sit in a circle with a group of people and one person whispers a phrase to the person next to him or her. Then, each person keeps whispering the phrase around the circle until it reaches the last person, who repeats the whispered statement out loud. What started out as "Pizza tastes great" can end up as "Pete's a great ape!"

It's funny to laugh at how twisted the sentence became as it got passed around. Gossip can work the same way, but it's not so funny. In fact, it can be very hurtful. Have you ever gossiped or been gossiped about?

Talk Versus Gossip

Talking is how you spread your thoughts, ideas, and experiences to people around you. It's not always wrong to talk about other people. There's nothing wrong with telling your friends, "I like hanging out with John Doe. He tells the funniest stories!" Those words don't hurt anyone.

But when you say cruel or tacky things, tell stories that you're not sure are true, or reveal information you know is supposed to remain private, you are spreading gossip. What if you saw John Doe go into the pastor's office and you started wondering what he was going in there for - did he ask to speak to the pastor, or did the pastor call him in? There's nothing wrong with wondering that, but what if you started telling other people wild things you dreamed up about John Doe talking to the pastor and they were just things off the top of your head? You really don't know why he was in the pastor's office, right? But before you know it, everyone is talking about how John Doe or his family are at outs with the pastor, or he's resigning his post as usher or whatever. Then next time everyone's at church, they're whispering around John Doe and people start to ask him what happened in the pastor's office.

John Doe might be a little angry or confused about all the questions, especially if it's a very personal family matter or spiritual matter or both.

That's how rumors work. They start small and often blow up into something different from the truth.

What If It's True?

Try to avoid talking about stuff that would embarrass another person. Before you blab, try this test: Ask yourself if you would want other people to know or say that kind of stuff about you.

Sometimes a friend will admit something to you and ask you not to tell anyone else. It can be hard not to share a secret, especially when it's something you really want to talk about with other friends. Maybe you don't even understand why the person wants you to keep the information a secret.

Sometimes, you may overhear something and your mind starts spinning. But remember that you might have heard just one side of the story.

Gossip Busters

"A talebearer revealeth secrets: but he that is of a faithful spirit concealeth the matter." Proverbs 11:13

Some people are in denial that they are gossipers. They hear something and decide to share it with others (or you) and are in complete denial that they are actually "talebearing." A talebearer is one who "collects" gossip and also one who "spreads" it. If one "hears" something - that doesn't give license to "repeat" it to someone else. Even if they think they are doing some good by telling what they know, NOTHING good ever comes from gossip.

Individuals will gossip for various reasons (although there is no good excuse for talebearing), they will gossip because they're jealous, they're resentful, they may have pinned up feelings toward someone and rather than going to that person, will run their mouth, make false accusations and say things they have no knowledge about or authority to speak on. If you are entertaining friends who do this, be advised...If someone gossips with you, he or she is likely to gossip about you also!

The best way to avoid being a part of the gossip mill is to STEER CLEAR of those who gossip. If you happen to hear a rumor, don't repeat it - and don't listen to it, either. And when someone trusts you with a personal secret, keep it to yourself.

If you're the victim of gossip, you might as well know that this happens to a lot of people. Rather than stooping to their level, counsel with your pastor. The devil might be working on those who are gossiping about you...they may be letting the devil ride, but don't allow yourself to get on that same level and dish it back out. Remember: two wrongs do not make a right.

My best advice is to surround yourself with people who would rather live their own private lives and worry about keeping themselves straight rather than talk about someone else or some gossip they've heard! I don't care to hear any negative talk or gossip that someone has said about me...I don't care to have people come tell me something they've heard that was said about me or anyone else for that matter. I consider the source. The devil preys on an idle mind. Don't become a part of a circle of gossipers. Don't sit in neutral waiting for this junk to come into your ear zone. Keep your mind focused on good things, honest things and do unto others as you would have them do unto you.

P.S. I just love blogging because I can preach if I want to - it's my blog! :-)

Time Flies

I did not realize I had not updated my blog since March 29th. The spring months of April and May were extremely busy for me at work (Overby Center at Ole Miss), but I suppose the main reason I haven't updated for many months is because of a near-fatal car accident I had on May 25th. Without rehashing all of the incident I'll just say that God is good and I am a walking miracle. Still struggling with some lingering injuries, I am quite fortunate to be alive to feel the pain, frankly. God is not finished with me yet. I am back in the saddle again, pushing forward to the fall semester with great anticipation.

It is a bitter-sweet time at the Jeter household this week. My 15-year-old son, Alex returns to high school as an entering freshman. He's so excited, ready to hit the books and play ball. He has worked out almost every night lately trying to crunch his abs and build up his pecks (so funny). Everything about him has changed. He's maturing, getting so tall (over 6ft) and his "interests" have changed, as is the case with most 15-year-old boys (*wink).

My daughter, Alana mentioned this afternoon that she just might walk Alex to his first class tomorrow. She was emotional just thinking about the fact that she will NOT return to the same school, but is beginning a new chapter in her own life as a COLLEGE freshman. We are quite proud of her as she was awarded an ACT scholarship and will enter as a psych major. She is experiencing what I define as "excited nervousness." With 15 hours of coursework and one of those online, she will attend classes and continue to work her part-time job this fall.

You know, parenting is considered one of the most important jobs in the world. And while it may be one of the most rewarding, it is not easy. Neither is letting go. These are landmark years for our children, one entering high school and the other off to college. I'm 40 and my husband will turn 45 in December (really landmark years for us in a way). It is during these times I like to just step back, take a deep breath and take it all in...try to enjoy these first moments or experiences with our kids.

I've been reminiscing in my mind of how I cried the day I left them at daycare for the first time, and how I cried their first day of public kindergarten. I have pictures of the first time Alex stepped on the school bus and waved back at me. My heart just skipped a beat at that moment...I couldn't believe my baby was off to public school. While that was 10 years ago, it seems like yesterday - and now I find myself experiencing similar feelings... just can't believe my not-so-little man is off to high school tomorrow and my little girl has become a young woman and will walk onto the same college campus her father and I attended many years ago to begin to find her way in this crazy world.

My how times flies when you're having fun!

Order My Steps Lord

"The steps of a good man are ordered by the Lord, and he delighteth in his way. Though he fall, he shall not be utterly cast down, for the Lord upholdeth him with His hand. I have been young and am now old, yet I have not seen the righteous forsaken nor his seed begging bread. He is ever merciful and lendeth and his seed is blessed." Psalms 37: 23-26

"Thy word is a lamp unto my feet and a light unto my path." Psalms 199: 105

God's desire is to walk with us. He has ordered our path, watched our steps and kept us from danger. He wants communion and fellowship with us. When you are walking according to the will of God, He will direct your path and give you direction. God's way is always the right way. He knows where He is going. He knows the end from the beginning. The greatest thing you can have going for you in your Christian walk is to have God order your steps.

Before anybody can walk, they must first learn how to do something very important. They must learn how to stand. We are living in a generation of people who don't want to take a stand. Paul said in Ephesians 6: 10-18, to be strong in the Lord and in the power of His might. He tells the Ephesians to put on the whole armour of God to withstand the evil day and take a stand.

The Word says to "pray always with all prayer and supplication in the spirit." The Lord orders the steps of a good man!

Psalms 37 paints a picture of the difference between a "good" man and an "evil man."

Evil man:

1) cut down like grass

2) wither like herbs

3) shall be cut off

4) plots against the just

5) kills

6) arms shall be broken

7) shall perish

8) borrows and does not pay back

9) seeds shall be cut off

10) seeks to slay the righteous

Good man:

1) trusts in the Lord

2) delights in the Lord

3) commits his ways to God

4) rests in the Lord

5) shall inherit the earth

6) they shall be satisfied even in famine

7) has an eternal inheritance

8) has his steps ordered by the Lord

9) he shall not be cast down even when he falls

10) is upheld by the hand of the Lord

11) never forsaken or begging bread

12) shall be exalted

God will delight in us if we commit ourselves to Him. Take a stand! Let God order your steps. Watch Him do some stuff that will amaze you.

Order My Steps in your word dear Lord, lead me, guide me everyday. Send your anointing, Father I pray. Order my steps in your Word. Please order my steps in your Word.

One Step at a Time

The Lord said to Abram, Go for yourself [for your own advantage] away from your country, from your relatives and your father’s house, to the land that I will show you. — Genesis 12:1

When King Jehoshaphat needed to hear from God, Abram learned to trust God to lead him one step at a time. His story begins in Genesis 12:1. It is here that God gave Abram step one - not step two. He basically told him that he would not get step two until he had accomplished step one. This is so simple, but so profound and really insightful about how God speaks to us. He gives us direction "one step at a time."

Many people refuse to take step one until they think they understand steps two, three, four, and five. We should be inspired to go forward in God’s plan for our life by trusting Him with the first step. After the first few steps, faith will grow because we should then realize there is always a sure foundation beneath each step God instructs us to take.

God asked Abram to take a difficult step by leaving everything and everyone familiar to him. But, God promised him that taking such a step would be to his advantage.

When we obey God we are blessed. God has a good plan for each of our lives, a plan that is to our advantage. All we have to do is walk in it— "one step at a time."

Obey God’s voice one step at a time.

On the Lord's Side

When a man's ways please the LORD, he maketh even his enemies to be at peace with him. (Proverbs 16.7)

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Abraham Lincoln was once asked by a member of a certain church who was making a plea for a certain cause and closed his remarks with the hope "that the Lord is on our side." President Lincoln then responded by commenting, "Sir, I am not at all concerned about that, for we know that the Lord is always on the side of right. But it is my constant anxiety and prayer that I and this nation should choose to be on the Lord's side."

Today we know the things that will make for peace, but will we do them? Blessed are the peace-makers for they are the children of God. Discipleship begins with such a choice. To be on the Lord's side is far more an important issue than trying to get the Lord to be on "our" side.

Frankly, I hate having enemies, and I certainly don't want to be one. After studying this verse it has become clear that we need to please the Lord...then he will cause peace to happen. We should strive to please him everyday in everything we do - big or small. Walk with Him. Stay tight with the Lord and He can sort out things with enemies. We know a proverb is a principle and not a promise—but it is a nice principle to have on your side!

Search me, O God, and know my heart: try me, and know my thoughts: And see if there be any wicked way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting. (Psalm 139:23)

His Strength is Perfect

There are days when I feel that I do not have the energy to get out of bed to face the day. Somehow He gives me the energy and I breeze through the day.

There are days when I think I cannot handle one more bit of bad news. Somehow when it comes, He empowers me to handle it.

There are days when life is hard and the desire to continue fades. Somehow He sends relief and increases my desire to live.

There are days when I doubt His presence. Somehow He reveals Himself in the most surprising ways.

There are days when I feel like my labors for Him are in vain. Somehow He sends someone or something to assure me they are not in vain.

There are days when I cannot find a reason for joy. Somehow He fills my life with so much joy that I am overwhelmed by it.

There are days when words come slowly, and when they do finally come they sound foolish and empty. Somehow He takes those words and uses them for good.

There are days when I feel almost worthless. Somehow He reminds me of the price that has been paid for me.

There are days when I wish I could see the way more clearly. Somehow He opens my eyes and I see Him more clearly.

There are days when when I am weak. Somehow He makes me strong.

“But he said to me, ‘My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness. ... For when I am weak, then I am strong.” (2 Corinthians 12:9-10, NIV).

Let Him be your strength everyday!

It's a New Season (Praise the Lord!) and it's coming to me!

My friend Delayna passed this on to me and I really needed it today. What a great song with a great message. It's a new season and it's coming my way. Sheryl Brady is the singer.

I've Got the Blues Today

I'm struggling today. I feel like I have a case of "the blues." Surely you've all been there at one time or another? I can't really pinpoint why I feel this way. There are some issues in my life that are bugging me somewhat, but I'm trying to deal with them and move on. I discovered some suggestions for overcoming days like today and some of these I've already conquered (thank goodness):

GET OUT OF BED: One of the most important things you can do is get up at about the same time every morning (even week-ends). Preferably, that means about 7 a.m. or earlier. You might not feel like it but Get Up. Such regularity helps your body function more normally so you're more likely to feel normal.

LIGHTS: Light helps your body function better. So turn on a lot of lights as soon as you arise. Open curtains to get more sunlight. Better yet, go outdoors into the sunshine as soon as you can. Remove any eyewear so light will enter more readily (glass cuts out some of the sun's rays). But don't stare at the sun, of course.

MOVE: Be active right away -- oxygenate! That means getting up and walking around your dwelling for five or 10 minutes, or perhaps riding an exercycle. Mild exercise gets the blood flowing and transports more oxygen throughout your body (especially to your brain), helping you feel mentally alert and alive.

MUSIC: Select and play some energetic, happy music as you dress and have your breakfast. The audiovisual department of most libraries has albums and tapes you can check out.

BREAKFAST: Begin your breakfast with protein (i.e., meat, eggs, peanut butter, nuts, cheese). When you get up, your body chemistry is ready to convert food, especially protein, into long-lasting energy. To balance your most important meal of the day, add an orange or other fresh fruit and whole grain cereal or whole grain bread.

TALK WITH SOMEONE: One of the quickest ways to beat the blues is to interact with others. You might not feel like doing that - you'd rather avoid people when blue. So make lt easier on yourself. Talk with someone you enjoy about a subject you enjoy so there is definite give and take.

And, force yourself to say "hello" to the persons next to you in class, those where you live, anyone around.

LIMIT CAFFEINE: The long-term (four hours or so) effects of caffeine are depression. Try to limit coffee to no more than one cup in the morning. Coffee can make you more alert for an hour or so, but later you get an opposite reaction. Caffeine tends to increase the release of insulin in the blood, and insulin lowers the blood sugar level. When you have low blood sugar levels, you begin to feel less sure of yourself, and have low energy levels, which can lead to the blues or depression.

LIMIT SUGAR: Sugar might give you an initial rush of energy, but within an hour or so the blood sugar level can become low, and when it's low you may feel low, too.

The caffeine/sugar cycle. It's easy to get caught in the caffeine and sugar cycle -- having coffee, caffeinated soft drinks, or something with sugar every two hours or so to "stay up." For example, cola contains about 10 teaspoons of sugar plus caffeine equal to about half a cup of coffee. In addition to bringing on the blues, this cycle can result in dependence, poor nutrition. and obesity -- reasons to get down on yourself even more and feel blue.

MAINTAIN FIBER: Fiber helps food go through your digestive system at a proper rate, giving a more constant energy supply. Highly processed foods merely provide a quick surge of energy which can be followed by depression. You can maintain fiber in your diet by eating an orange or grapefruit rather than just drinking the juice. Eat fresh vegetables, fresh fruits, and whole grain breads and cereals.

STRESS B COMPLEX: Some persons report receiving help by taking a concentrated vitamin B complex. You'll find these called something like "Stress B" or "B 50." This is controversial. Some nutritionists say, "Yes, this really should be considered," and others say, "No, this is not a good Idea." You can try some and decide whether or not it helps you. If it does help, then perhaps you should consult a nutritionist to see if there are other ways you can augment your diet.

ROUTINES: Changing your routines is another way to help shake the blues. Choose a different combination of clothes to wear, walk rather than drive, take a different route, eat at a different place. Do something different to help break the routine.

It's hard. Getting up in the morning, turning on the lights, eating a nutritious breakfast, keeping busy--keeping such a schedule is not always easy.

You might need help for the first few days, someone to help you form good habits, get you out of bed. turn on the lights, make sure you have a good breakfast, someone to help you be more active. One good way is to make a contract with a friend or friends who want to see you change. It might seem embarrassing, but those friends want to see you healthy and happy rather than depressed and difficult to be around. Note: If you feel that you need the help of someone for more than three or four days, you probably should make an appointment with a counselor or psychotherapist. You don't want to wear out your friends!

DEVELOP SUPPORTS: Good old-fashioned support works wonders. Most of us have not developed "support systems." We need to think about that idea ahead of time, if we have the tendency to feel blue, so that the supports can be available when needed. Plan ahead by filling out the last section of this publication and keep it handy. In addition to developing your own resources, you might know of some community support groups for persons with the blues. Call the local mental health center to see if there are some groups you might be a part of. Some places to call for leads at K-State will be listed at the end of this brochure.

What do you do when you feel yourself coming down with the blues? Recognize the change in yourself when you are "coming down" with an emotional slump. Don't deny it or feel guilty. Rather, take charge of yourself right away.

Perhaps taking a day off and doing some favorite things will restore you. Get more exercise: walk, garden, cycle, swim. You might not feel like it, but exercise is one of the best depression breakers and preventers.

PRETEND: Put a smile on your face and pretend that you are happy. Stand straight rather than falling into that slouching, depressed posture. Sound hokey? Well, it isn't. Research demonstrates that forming a facial expression actually changes how you feel inside. And pretending to feel an emotion results in actually feeling it. Frowners feel sadder. And the depressing effects last for hours. So smile: at yourself and others, even trees or dogs or cats. Sure, it's tough to smile when you're feeling blue. The extra effort you muster to do it will help you break the blues.

Wear bright, happy clothes and pretend you are happy. You will then find yourself happy. Maybe, even wear a goofy shirt or blouse or cap so you can see others smile with you. Dressing cheerfully and pretending can beat the blues.

SEEK OUT HUMOR: See a funny movie, read a humorous book, or listen to a comedy tape/CD. When you see a really funny cartoon, make a copy and save it. Consciously decide to use and employ these things when you find yourself coming down with the blues. Singing can help -- make yourself do it.

EXERCISE: It's worth stating again: Exercise is a great way to break depression. Walk, go to the Rec Center and ride an exercycle, swim, or climb stairs if it's too cold or hot outside.

Do not give in to those inner blues that say, "I don't feel like it." Doing almost anything constructive will be beneficial.

A Sound Mind

"For God hath not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind." (II Tim. 1:7, KJV)

The concept of a "sound mind" has more to do with our attitude than we may realize. If our mind is sound, it is not cluttered up with the cares of this world. Its processes start with God and end with God. It recognizes the power of God and His love for us. However, having and maintaining a sound mind requires constant work, a positive approach, and an acceptance of both the good and the bad. It needs continual stirring, like a simmering pot on the stove. We have to guard it and exercise it at all times.

When we have a sound mind we recognize that we are special to God, not from our own strength but because of the gift of the Holy Ghost. Even though we may be only one person and seem insignificant, we must have the kind of mind that takes charge of itself and moves forward, and not in "retreat" as many of God's people are doing today. Our God is a very positive God, one who looks forward to the future and the promises of having us as a key part of His creation.

One of my favorite bible scriptures is "To everything there is a season, and a time for every matter or purpose under heaven." (Ecclesiastes 3:1) This scripture tells me that we all do not live in the same season - at the same time. With that being said, we should never be jealous of someone who is enjoying harvest while we are still in the planting season. Others have had to go through a season of planting just as I may be. Seeing the results they are enjoying should be an encouragement. We need to understand and trust that God is doing the very best for us in our "present" season.

We all hear of and talk about planting and "seed time." You see, seed time represents learning the will of God. Each time I choose God's will instead of my own, I'm planting a good seed that will eventually bring a harvest in my life. If I want to be victorious, I can't afford to get pulled into the world's system and doing what I feel like doing. James 1:21 says "...get rid of all uncleanness and the rampant outgrowth of wickedness, and in a humble (gentle, modest) spirit receive and welcome the Word which implanted and rooted [in your heart] contains the power to save your souls."

Our soul is our mind...it's our will and our emotions. When the Word gets rooted in there and begins to change our mind, it begins to heal our emotions and turns our will away from "self-will" onto doing the will of God. Living out of one's own soul is equivalent to staying in the wilderness. When my flesh is finally crucified and I get out of my soul (my self-will) and into doing the will of God, that's when I enter the promised land. The promised land is knowing who you are in Christ, knowing how to fellowship with Him, enjoying His presence, and having peace, contentment and joy.

Between seed time and harvest comes a time of waiting. After a seed is planted, the heat, moisture and pressure of the ground causes the outer layers or hull to crack open - then roots shoot down and dig their way through the ground. It takes time for all this to happen, and it all takes place "underground." Above the ground, you can't tell anything is happening. You see, that's the way our lives are. After we plant seeds of obedience, we feel like nothing is happening, but all kinds of things are happening inside that we can't see. And like the seed that finally bursts through the ground with that beautiful green shoot, our seeds of obedience finally break forth into a beautiful manifestation of God in our lives.

We all want good things to happen in our lives, but too often we want it now...not later. When it doesn't happen that way, we are tempted to ask, "When, God, when?" Most of us need to grow in the area of trusting God instead of focusing on the “when” question. I'm reminded of a song I dearly love that was written by the late great Rev. James McFall entitled "I Still Trust You Lord"... it says,

"I've seen the righteous man suffer pain
And it looked like the wicked would go free.
And in my frustration it just didn't seem right to me.
I asked you for sunshine, but you sent rain.
I cried for healing and I only got pain.
But I know your love will see me through,
'Cause Lord, I still trust you.

I still trust you Lord, I still trust you Lord.
That you're able to guide me through this dry barren land.
And when I don't know which way to turn or go,
I still trust you Lord, so let me hold to your hand."

Second verse goes on to say:

"I trust you because you've been so faithful to me
And you said in your word I'll never leave nor forsake thee.
Lord I'll go with you until the end
Your blood has cleansed me from all guilt and sin
Your promise I can hold on to
'Cause Lord I still trust you."

If you're missing joy and peace, you're not trusting God. If your mind feels worn out all the time, you're not trusting God. The tendency to want to know about everything that's going on can be detrimental to our Christian walk. Sometimes knowing everything can be uncomfortable and can even hurt you. There have been times when I was impatient, frustrated and disappointed because there were things I didn't know. God had to teach me to leave things alone and quit feeling that I needed to know everything. Now... I don't "want" to know every little thing. Many times it's best if I "don't" know some things. I've learned to trust the One who knows all things and accept the fact that some questions may never be answered. We prove that we trust God when we refuse to worry. So I'll leave you with a bit of advice: Don't be a worry wart! Just let God take over.

Sidebar:
Someone ran into Brother McFall in Walmart in Philadelphia, MS (town where he lived) and asked him what inspired him to write "I Still Trust You". He said that it was about a preacher friend of his who had gone through some severe trials. He had been treated very badly by some church folks, and shortly thereafter had been through the death of a child. The preacher came to visit Brother McFall and they went fishing. Brother McFall asked him how in the world he was coping with all of the sorrow he had been through. The preacher said "I Still Trust Him"... As soon as he could get to a phone, Brother McFall called his son, J.R. and said get a pen and some paper and write this down, and that's how the song was written.

It was 6 years ago February 15th (2004) when my faith was tried and tested. My husband and I had been out of town overnight and came back in on a Saturday (the 15th). We went to a 40th wedding anniversary celebration of my husband's uncle and wife in New Albany. Everything seemed fine until about mid-way of the party when my son complained of hurting in his right side. He was really out of control with the pain.

Under the Weather

I didn't want to let the day pass without posting something as I am making every effort to post daily, or at least 5 days a week. I do have a good thought I want to post, but I need a little more time to finalize it. Since I'm feeling a little under the weather today, I'm going to develop it further and will post it later.

So many of my friends are sick with the flu and the cold weather, rain and snow have not helped matters any. I have a "dry" cough and this occasional weighty feeling like a cinder block is on my chest. I'm running a little fever and have had chills since late yesterday afternoon. I got up at 3 a.m. and put on a thick bathrobe over my PJs as well as a pair of socks. I crawled back in bed with all that on, covered up with a sheet, comforter and quilt on top of that...still had chills. I have no runny nose or sore throat but my head has hurt since yesterday. After coming in to the office and doing a little research, I discovered the following:

COLD vs. FLU:
Fever is rare with a cold. Fever is usually present with the flu in up to 80% of all flu cases. A temperature of 100°F or higher for 3 to 4 days is associated with the flu. (GREAT!!!)

A hacking, productive (mucus- producing) cough is often present with a cold. A non-productive (non-mucus producing) cough is usually present with the flu (sometimes referred to as dry cough). (HELLO?)

Stuffy nose is commonly present with a cold and typically resolves spontaneously within a week. Stuffy nose is not commonly present with the flu. (LOVELY!)

Chills are uncommon with a cold. 60% of people who have the flu experience chills. (THIS IS NOT LOOKING GOOD!)

Cold symptoms tend to develop over a few days. The flu has a rapid onset within 3-6 hours. The flu hits hard and includes sudden symptoms like high fever, aches and pains. (JUST HIT ME SUNDAY ALL OF A SUDDEN).

A headache is fairly uncommon with a cold. A headache is very common with the flu, present in 80% of flu cases. (GOOD LORD - I HAD TO TAKE TYLENOL LAST NIGHT AND TODAY FOR BAD HEADACHE.)

Sore throat is commonly present with a cold. Sore throat is not commonly present with the flu. (I HAVE NOT HAD A SORE THROAT.)

Hmm...I don't remember ever having the flu. I've had bronchitis and walking pneumonia - but not the flu. My dad has just had a 2-week bout with it and lost 20 pounds in the process...was very weak and stayed in bed. Geesh...I'm starting to feel worse just thinking about it. Check the blog later to see if I'm still alive. I don't need this mess!

Oh When the Saints Go Marching In!

Who dat? Well, they did it. The New Orleans saints won their first Super Bowl - ever. No doubt this is one for the history books and I'm sure there is some major partying going on in the French Quarter tonight! They'll probably be partying for a month.

Brees threw for 288 yards and 2 touchdowns, including the game-winning strike to Jeremy Shockey (who by the way is a former teammate of Eli Manning when playing for the New York Giants), with 5:42 remaining the game, and the New Orleans Saints beat the Colts 31-17 to claim the team's first NFL championship at Sun Life Stadium in Miami, FL.

While I would have liked to see the Colts pull it off, my husband reminded me of something I have to agree with. As some of you know, I work at Ole Miss...I am a journalism major, and my husband is an Ole Miss alum also. He reminded me that while Eli followed in his dad's footsteps and came to Ole Miss to revive the Rebels' football program, Peyton was somewhat a traitor by going to the University of Tennessee. What could I say...he is right. Something in me felt sorry for Peyton when he threw those interceptions because I know he is a great quarterback. But apparently it wasn't meant for the Colts to win this one.

I was impressed that Drew Brees gave 'God' credit for the win, and it was touching to see him holding his baby boy on the field, watching all the streamers, confetti and balloons fall. While shedding tears of joy, Drew held his baby boy, talking to him and sharing the exciting record-breaking experience with him. It was a poignant moment. I thought to myself...after the blow of Hurricane Katrina on their city, this has to be a sweet come-back for the "who dat?" nation of New Orleans. Congratulations Saints! I tip my Rebel hat to you. You played an awesome season, played an awesome bowl game, and you deserve it!

Super Bowl XILV

The top "10 things" you need to know about Super Bowl XILV.

1. The cost of a 30-second commercial during this year's game is around $2.8million.

More than $200m will be spent on ads aired before, during and after the game.
2. Colts quarterback Peyton Manning was actually born in New Orleans! His dad Archie Manning was the Saints quarterback at the time.
3. The half-time show will be performed by The Who.
4. The winning team will get $83,000 per man and the losers $42,000.
5. The Colts have won five Super Bowls, while the Saints make their bow this year.
6. Saints defensive player Darren Sharper led the league with nine interceptions. Watch out for him, he wears number 42.
7. This is the 10th time the Super Bowl will be held in Miami and the fifth in the Sun Life Stadium ('89, '95, '99 and '07). This is the 15th time the Super Bowl will be held in the state of Florida.
8. The Colts go into the game with the league's lowest running attack - only the second time in history that it's happened. The first was the Arizona Cardinals last year.
9. This year's coin toss is a bit special. The crew of the Space Shuttle Atlantis took the coin into space before handing it over.
10. Kim Kardashian is the girlfriend of star Saints running back Reggie Bush.

What does a peacemaker look like? Have you ever seen one?

It has been said that peacemakers are people who breathe grace. They draw continually on the goodness and power of Jesus Christ, and then they bring his love, mercy, forgiveness, strength, and wisdom to the conflicts of daily life.

I remember when I was a very young girl at a slumber party one time in Pontotoc. There were probably 10 of us girls and we were definitely competitive back then. Several got in a bad fight, some pushing and fighting broke out and the host mother broke it up, called us all in to her living room, sat us down shoulder to shoulder and read the "blessed are the peacemakers" scripture and gave us a mini-sermon on getting along. What was so funny is she was so stressed and angry at that moment that when she read the scripture she accidently said, "blessed are the pee-makers"...and that was it - that was the ice-breaker...we all busted out laughing. Funny how that occurred 28 years ago, yet I remember it vividly as if it were yesterday.

Do you naturally "breathe grace?" I know I don't...not yet anyway, but it is what God calls us to do. Not all of us are called to teach a Bible study, sing in the choir, or work with youth, but all of us are called to "go and be reconciled" (Matt. 5:24) to our brothers and sisters, our friends and family, and the people in our churches and community. God calls us all to be "biblical peacemakers," to allow his redemptive, transforming love to spill over into our relationships.

Go spill some peace on some folks today! It might stain them for life. A friend and I were reminiscing about this and I know we've never forgotten that night.

I Love Lucy

This version of "I Love Lucy" is not a review of an old Ricky, Lucy, Fred and Ethel rerun. This is the story of a re-life Lucy who may be as spunky as Lucy Ricardo was, but she certainly doesn't get in as much trouble! There is a saying, "A dog is man's best friend because it wags its tail - and not its tongue." Well, I thank the Lord for my precious little "chihuaweenie" Lucy Lu-Lu...the little princess of the Jeter household.

Lucy's mother was a red miniature dachshund and her father was a small "white" chihuahua (still haven't figured how they hooked up), but Lucy is the sweetest, most loyal friend and gives unconditional love.

Our lives changed when we brought her home 6 years ago. She really has a lot of personality - she is so smart! She craves teriyaki beef jerky and Clift's homemade sausage balls, and when we sit down to eat...she thinks it's time for her to eat. When she's not harrassing us for a bite, or glaring up through the glasstop kitchen table with her begging little eyes...she'll just mosey over to her food station and eat whatever is there while we eat. She will take you down for some deer meat too! Insistent on standing on a rug instead of my kitchen tile to eat...she grabs the bite and runs into the dining room to leave all her crumbs on my new contemporary rug!

She's a snuggler...and that's just a chihuahua trait...they want to stay warm all the time. She likes to be completely covered up with a blanket on your chest or in your lap (I don't see how she breathes like that). My kids have even spoiled her by plugging up a heating pad for her to lay on. I'm telling you, this gal is "pampered." She has an ultra plush suede and silkened fur bed that's about 4 times bigger than her. She just gets lost in it - you have to roll a round to find her in it.

She has a toy that we call "the baby." I bought it at Walmart for 80 cents...looks sort of like the "hoops & yo-yo" characters on the singing Hallmark cards that wreak on your nerves. If you ask her, "Lucy, where's the baby? Bring me the baby," she will go nuts...she'll whimper and grunt and will go get her baby. We will say, "Lucy, now spank that baby. Spank it!" and she will take that squeeky toy in her mouth and literally slam her head back and forth, left to right knocking it to the ground..."spanking the baby." It's a brutal whipping and it is absolutely hilarious. The more you cheer her on to "spank the baby," the more she beats it. I've often said it's much cuter than any of the funniest animal videos on tv. It occurred to me that I need to submit a video of her spanking the baby. Some have won $10,000 on there just for having their bird chirp. Why...we could possibly win some money!

It's interesting to me how a dog will sense that you are down, when even family members don't. Of course I just had surgery and the day I came home from the hospital she was so excited to see us, but she soon figured out that she couldn't run and jump in my lap like she normally does. She quickly toned down and sort of had a creepy way about moving around me...trying to be careful not to hurt me. Her common reaction was to try to do something to cheer me up, even if that meant having to settle for lying at my feet rather than in my lap.

Lucy gives me (and my family) unconditional love...she is totally devoted to us. Once the trust is established, a dog will stick with you through thick and thin. They will share your joys and happiness, be there through your sorrow, always trying to give you love and never expecting a great deal in return. That's a true friend isn't it? I Do Love Lucy.

The Devil Wears Red Velvet

Some Facebook friends asked for the recipe for a cake my grandmother made, "The Devil Wears Red Velvet." I'm not sure if she is "able" to make it for the public, she's 86 yrs. old, but layer cakes are not difficult to make. I've provided the recipe below, (a death wish for a diabetic like me), but it is awesomely delicious!

Make this for your sweetie for Valentine's Day and they'll love you forever...or drop dead trying!!!

The recipe published in a local Mississippi newspaper. Whoever the chick is that came up with the recipe - she ought to be shot. It's sinful, but a genious creation for chocolate lovers. If you're prayed up and ready to meet your maker - this is the way to go!!!
________________________

**You will make 2 different cake batters because you alternate red velvet for 2 layers and devil's food for 2 layers (and very thick layers as you can see). You must use 9-in. rounds.

Red Velvet Cake ingredients:

1⁄2 cup shortening
1⁄2 cups sugar
3 eggs
2 tablespoons cocoa
1 1⁄2 ounces red food coloring
1 teaspoon salt
2 1⁄2 cups flour
1 teaspoon vanilla
1 cup buttermilk
1 cup sour cream

Devil’s Food Cake ingredients:

3⁄4 cup unsweetened cocoa
1 1⁄3 cups granulated sugar, divided
1 1⁄4 cups milk, scalded
2 cups cake flour, sifted or stirred before measuring
1 1⁄4 teaspoons baking soda
1 teaspoon salt
2⁄3 cup shortening
3 eggs
1 1⁄4 teaspoons vanilla extract

Chocolate Cream Cheese Icing:

1 pound unsalted butter, softened
2 (8-oz.) packages cream cheese, softened
2 teaspoons vanilla
2 pounds powdered sugar
1⁄2 cup cocoa

For the red velvet cake, cream shortening; beat in sugar gradually. Add eggs, one at a time; beat well after each addition. Make paste of cocoa and food coloring; add to creamed mixture. Add salt, flour and vanilla alternately with buttermilk and sour cream, beating well after each addition. Stir until thoroughly mixed. Bake in two 9-inch prepared cake pans for 30 minutes at 350 degrees.

For the devil’s food cake, sift the cocoa with 1⁄3 cup sugar; pour in the milk gradually and stir until well blended. Set aside to cool. Sift together flour, remaining 1 cup sugar, soda, and salt. Add shortening and half of the cooled cocoa and milk mixture. Beat at medium speed of an electric hand-held mixer. Add eggs, vanilla, and remaining cocoa and milk mixture. Continue beating for about 2 minutes, scraping bowl with a spatula occasionally. Pour into two 9-inch prepared cake pans. Bake at 350 degrees for 25 to 30 minutes.

For the icing, mix butter and cream cheese until creamy. Mix in vanilla, and then gradually stir in the powdered sugar and cocoa.

To assemble, alternate and frost the Red Velvet and Devil’s Food cake layers to have a striped effect when cake is sliced. If desired, complete frosting by drizzling the cake with melted chocolate. You will never be the same after you eat this one!!!

Deep Thoughts

These thoughts (or quotes) crossed my path this morning and I wanted to archive and share them with my fellow bloggers:


"Choose you this day whom you will let ruin your day."
~ quote by good friend Anita Vance of Houston, MS

There is nothing worse that aggressive stupidity.
~ Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

Insanity: doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.
~ Albert Einstein

A woman is like a tea bag. You never know how strong she is until she gets in hot water.
~ Eleanor Roosevelt

Optimists think the glass is half full. Pessimists think the glass is half empty. Realists know that someone will have to wash the glass.
~ posted by Selina Jeter Arwood, Maryville, TN (cousin by marriage)

Time is the coin of your life. It is the only coin you have, and only you can determine how it can be spent. Be careful lest you let other people spend it for you.
~ Carl Sandburg

The male is a domestic animal, which if treated with firmness, can be trained to do most things.
~ Jilly Cooper

Jealousy is all the fun you think they had.
~ Erica Jong, Fear of Flying (1973)

An ignorant person is one who doesn't know what you have just found out.
~ Will Rogers

If someone betrays you once, it's their fault. If someone betrays you twice, it's your fault.
~ Eleanor Roosevelt

Live in such a way that you would not be ashamed to sell your parrot to the town gossip.
~ Will Rogers

No one can make you feel inferior without your consent.
~ Eleanor Roosevelt

Forgive your enemies, but never forget their names.
~ John F. Kennedy

The Wheels of My Life Are Rolling Along

Today has been an unusual day. While I seem to be on the mend from recent lapband surgery and had a good post-op visit with my surgeon yesterday, I have been struggling with an infection of gum and tooth area and had to see a dentist this morning. We are certainly stimulating the "medical" economy because my husband had to see his doctor for treatment of diabetes and other issues at the same time. I got out a lot cheaper than he did as I didn't have to pay anything (I had a credit), but he had to meet a deductible and the cost was over $400. I 'bout died!

After my appointment, as I arrived on the university campus to work, I received a text message from my mother saying that my stepfather ended up having cancer removed from his bladder this morning (and yes, that was unexpected). Not even 2 minutes later, a text from my father came up saying he had been extremely sick with the flu for the past 10 days...had been bed-ridden, was very weak and that he had lost 20lbs. He sounded terrible and said he was going back to bed, couldn't sit up. Luckily my mother is not ill today, but she has health problems herself and had been really sick with the flu just a few weeks prior. I thought I was beyond this feeling, but at that moment, it hit me again that I'm getting old and falling apart and my parents and step-parents are getting older and falling apart -AT THE SAME TIME. I am an only child, so do you get the picture?

I also began thinking that all of our married life my husband and I have planned to raise our children, work, retire and move to a certain coastal area where we have longed to live and enjoy retirement and live out our remaining years together. Now that we have a daughter graduating and going off to college this year and a son not far behind her, we can actually see the light at the end of the tunnel. However, we can't forget our parents. About the time the kids get through college and we get ready to retire, we may have to take care of them..and there's 2 of us...and 6 of them. Perhaps we should think about building our own nursing home facility or building a multi-family compound, eh? (Hmm...I really don't think we can live with our parents again.)

Oh Be Careful Little Tongue What You Say!

Some things have transpired lately and I've witnessed some situations that have really stimulated my thinking. Here's my soap box for the day!

We all make choices every minute of every day. Some of our choices or decisions are conscious ones that we have thought and prayed about before we even made them. Most other times, however, we are not even aware we have made a choice because it was an automatic response to an idea, a thought, or a circumstance. In some cases, that response is not a good one!

A Christian can ruin their witness by reacting in a negative way to circumstances. A ruined or damaged reputation, which might be difficult to repair, is the result of a wrong choice. Choosing to react inappropriately to the circumstances around us will impact our spiritual well being, and it will create the need to make a choice about repenting for the inappropriate behavior. A reputation is something we build over time by how we have reacted to the circumstances in our lives. It doesn't matter what our status is in life...no matter what position we hold...whether we are in management or low man on the totem pole at work, whether we are in church or some organizational leadership, or if we're just a prayer warrior on the pew, the actions and words that are projected from us make impressions on others...and youth are especially impressionable in these cases. If they witness negative or wrong behavior in someone - especially someone in leadership, it leaves a negative stigma in their mind of that person that often times is not easily erased, and you find that they lose respect.

Some of the factors that determine our reputation (as Christians) are based upon the following principles or actions:

~ Are we faithful to attend our local church?
~ Do we respect the pastor, other ministry and leadership of the church?
~ Are we helpful or are we a hindrance?
~ Do we pay our tithes regularly?
~ Do we sow negativity and discord?
~ Are we respectful of the property of the church and others, or are we careless with it?

A good reputation can be destroyed with just one bad choice...one negative incident, and it may be nearly impossible to repair the damage that has been done. Proverbs 18:19 says, "A brother offended is harder to be won than a strong city: and their contentions are like the bars of a castle."

We constantly fall short of perfection in living the "Christ-centered life" because of the choices we make. Forgiving ourselves and others is very often a difficult thing to do. When someone says something or does something that hurts us, we want revenge for the injustice we feel we have suffered. We may be wronged by a brother or sister without apology, but the Bible says in Romans 12:19 that we are not to take revenge, as that is God's and not our's. "Vengeance is mine thus saith the Lord."

One thing I was always taught is to respect the ministry and leadership of the church. It doesn't matter if you agree or not. I would never want to find myself paying for disrespectful actions - all because I couldn't control my temper or keep my tongue. I grew up practically living with my grandfather who pastored for over 35 years and I saw many things. But, now that I've been on this journey with my husband pastoring the last 7 years, I realize just how difficult and heavy that responsibility is.

I strongly believe we will stand before God and answer for how we chose to react in certain siutations. While we as individuals may not be able to control the circumstances we may find ourselves in, we can control how we "react" in situations. My husband has mentioned that often in his sermons, but more recently it has become a life-changing revelation to me. I know you've all witnessed people losing their temper...flying off and saying things they had no business saying. Well, while I still experience disappointment occasionally, I am no longer frustrated or surprised at the actions of other people...nothing surprises me and I guess it's because I've seen so much in my 40-year life span. People will fail you but God will never fail you. So, just be careful little tongue what you say, because when those words leave your mouth...you can't take them back and your actions and reactions will linger in the minds of those who witnessed it. Lord don't ever let me ruin my witness. Remember...Psalm 19:14 says, "Let the words of my mouth, and the meditation of my heart, be acceptable in thy sight, O LORD, my strength, and my redeemer."

Ok, that's my sermon (or soap box) for the day. Have a good one.

Life in the Fast Lane

I don't know how many times in the past 4 years I have attempted to start a blog. I've had friends who maintained some touching and humorous blogs, and I would always be inspired when I read them, yet I never followed through with posting to my own. I realize now that the reason I never followed through in my blogging attempts was that I never took time out of my busy schedule for "me." Upon turning 40 in December, I made a resolution to make some changes in my life and one is to make time for myself. I don't know what visitors expect to find in this blog - or what anyone expects to find in any blog for that matter, but it will certainly be healthy and beneficial for me to have this outlet to share my experiences, goals, thoughts and even vent if need be. As a pastor's wife, mother, singer, musician, friend, and department director at a major university, I feel like I live life in the fast lane, often burning the candle at both ends. Most of the time I cruise along just fine. At times it feels I'm accelerating -too fast, and at times I'm reducing speed. I have even crashed a few times, but I've always managed to get back on track. I'm sure this will be a wild and unpredictable ride, but I'm determined to stay on course with this blog. I hope that you will visit often. Wish me luck in this effort!